Mark has got bats in his belfry. Partly literally. Just substitute ‘belfry’ for ‘walls’.

Which is as good a reason as any to hold a Gothtastic singsong. Altogether now…

Baby is a cool machine
She moves to the pulse of a generator
She says damn that sex supreme
She says, she says damn that horror bat
Sex horror sex bat sex horror sex vampire
Sex bat horror vampire sex
Cool machine
Horror bat, Bite!
Cool Machine, Bite!
Sex vampire, Bite!
Bite!

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And with that, here’s Fresh Goods Friday…

Shimano XTR Di2

• Price: £various
• From: Freewheel

Lawks-a-lordy, it’s finally arrived. The latest and greatest drivetrain from the House Of Shimano. I’m sure you already know everything you want to know about this by now. Read our 10 favourite things about new Shimano XTR Di2 story if you don’t. The kit we’ve got for test is the shorter cage 9-45T option complete with 28T chainring and 165mm cranks. We’ll hopefully get the little lot on to a bike next week.

Vittoria Torrente Race XC Tyre

• Price: £69.99
• From: Freewheel

Summer is upon us so it’s time to break out mud tyres for all teh XC events that fall victim to (un)seasonal storms. These are Vittoria’s latest rubber weapons: “The Torrente Race is the ultimate mud cross-country (XC) race tyre, designed with wide tread spacing to prevent mud build-up and ensure consistent grip. Its ultra-soft race compound delivers exceptional traction, even in the toughest conditions.” The sidewalls remind me of Leatherface. Which is good and bad.

Shimano Brake Cabling and Profile Design Cork Bar Tape

• Price: £14.99 cabling, £11.99 bar tape
• From: Freewheel

In case you didn’t know, the world’s biggest bicycle race kicks off tomorrow. No, it’s not the Snow Bike World Championships again, it’s The Tour Of France. Much like when Wimbledon appears on the telly and the otherwise year-round empty tennis courts start to be populated, Le Tour often has the effect of making folk dig out their dusty old road bikes for a spin. And then put back in the shed once you realise mountain biking is quite a lot better. These bits are for such a temporary roadie renovation task.

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Stox Energy Socks

• Price: £44.99
• From: Stox Energy

Something for all your running and fast-hiking types. Techo socks. Featuring: Graduated compression — 23-32 mmHg CCL 2 (no, us neither), moisture-wicking Dryarn, padded toe and heels, “circular knitting technology” for a seamless finish, anatomical left and right fit. Claims: “boost blood circulation to reduce fatigue, cramps, and shin splints”. I’m still not going to go running. Heather might though.

Ride Concepts Tallac Clip Boa

• Price: £189.95
• From: Ride Concepts UK

ClipGrip rubber outsole, Hexagon outsole featuring reverse hex relief pattern on toe and heel for hike-able climbs and descents, PerformFit Wrap from the BOA Fit System, heel pull tab, anti-bacterial mesh lining, lightweight bonded upper featuring Cordura mesh, Li2 dial features multidirectional adjustment for tightening and loosening and low friction TX4 Lace, Integrated D3O pads for top-of-foot protection, D3O High Impact Zone Technology insole, fullly gusseted tongue, 40mm long cleat box with index markings,
RC PowerDrive nylon shank.

Leatt RideViz Pro Glasses

• Price: £129 (‘normal’ clear lenses), £139 (tinted lenses, shown), £154 (photochromatic)
• From: ZyroFisher

No, don’t strike a pose. Not now, not here! Too late…His head is _nearly_ this big…

These swish glasses from Leatt should be available later in the year, around October, but don’t worry that the gold-mirror lenses will only come out on super sunny winter days – there is a second, pink tinted clear lens in the box, which means you can have massive screens protecting your eyes all year round. There’s a neat cleaning cloth too, and of course you don’t need ‘I won the Tour’ showoff colours as they come in more subtle shades too.

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Knog Oi! Prima bell

• Price: £27.99
• From: Freewheel

How much(!) for a bell? Featuring 80 decibels of sweet-sounding ‘ding’, the Knog ‘Oi!’ bell is as polite a ‘get out of the way!’ audible sounder as you could wish for. It fits neatly onto your bars via a couple of different options. This is the 22.2mm version that sits on the narrower part of the bars, nearest your thumb, though there are versions that hide next to the stem if you want them out the way. A thumb lever triggers the metal bell with a tuned striker to give a pleasing ‘ding’ that resonates for a very long time, thanks to the well-isolated bell material. Unless you ride in the spooky woods all alone and never see other trail users, you might want one of these. And you’re going to love the ding.

Forum Thread of the Week

Congratulation to tall_martin Jr for this incredibly childish thread:

As before, the winning TOTW in FGF gets a prize. Sotall_martinplease email [email protected] your random prize. Don’t forget to include your postal address, as it really speeds up delivery logistics, innit.

Nothern Soil Fan Pack

• Price: £10.00
• From: The Singletrack Shop

To coincide with the Englishman On New Dirt feature in the latest issue, this pack contains everything you need to show your appreciation for Northern Soil: 2 x badges, 1 x sticker, 1 x keyringand 1 x magnet.

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Featured Member Reward of the Week

• Reward: 20% off VivoBareFoot
• From: Singletrack Member Rewards

About VivoBareFoot: “Founded in 2012 by two seventh-generation cobblers, Galahad and Asher Clark, Vivobarefoot is based on one simple insight – barefoot footwear is regenerative to human health.A Vivobarefoot product or experience is one that literally brings us closer to nature.”

Stale Goods Friday – Eurobike 2009 Edition

• Price: N/A
• From: Eurobike 2009

Featuring: an Orange with an idler, an orange Intense SlopeStyle, a Jones thing, a Pronghorn winkie pincher and a Cannondale that hadn’t actually been driven into a wall; it was actually designed to have that head angle.

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